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Post by Ladorak on Feb 28, 2011 0:48:29 GMT -5
Ladorak turned his attention to the long tail now, frowning a bit, but in an understanding manner. "Now there, there Jal Frenata." the Captain placed a paw on the weasel's shoulder. "No one ever expects war to be so heart rending. No one ever expects it to separate you from your family for so long. War is unnatural in that it does these things, yet it also heralds progress on rare occasions. I am an aberrant breed, in that I thrive in combat and patrolling the seas. Perhaps it has to do with my ancestry, which I just learned about tonight, but whatever it is, the warrior's blood flows in my veins. My head is clearest when I'm thinking of how to outwit and outfight my opponent." he explained.
"But don't get me wrong. That does not by any means indicate that I enjoy the taking of others' lives, or the carnage involved with war. It's very strange... war brings me to the sea. It's the only job I've ever been good at, and it most certainly can launch you into almost god-like status if you do well enough. I suppose it's my way of proving to the world that I'm stronger than whatever it can throw at me. That I go against the tide and make up for any past failings of mine." he explained, wondering if that made any sense.
"I grew up... more of a slave class than anything else. I was always told I wasn't good enough. Fighting and winning is my way of proving all of that wrong I suppose. To protect my homeland, that has done much for me, and to ensure I can keep an eye on those that matter the most to me as well. As far as family goes..." here the Captain paused, letting all that sink in.
"Hmm... your family will not stop loving you, even if you end up fighting for the other side. At least... if they truly cared about you they wouldn't. I used to think that perhaps my father was out there somewhere, when I was growing up on lonely Sampetra. Turns out he wasn't quite what I expected, but that doesn't matter. You need to be strong for this. You're serving now in one of the proudest traditions on the planet, and everyone, including myself, is counting on you to pull through. You're correct. Your nation and mine have never been allies since the League of Augsburg a hundred years ago, thanks primarily to Rosferia's royal family getting on the throne of your country. They've almost always allied for that very strong filial ties reason. Now though, things are different. The Rosferian royal family has been overthrown. Your nation is fighting very hard to restore them, and I don't think the alliance will rupture any time soon. You just have to believe in that... but here's an idea."
The ermine kept Selvis's gaze as best he as he could, as he wanted to reassure the weasel in this. "You can visit your family so long as we're allied and at peace. Only if war broke out would that change. But let's say it does. If it does, I would give you the option of backing out, and going back home. I would make something up. You weren't fit for duty, or simply needed to attend to family matters. It doesn't matter. If you really did not wish to serve against your country, I would understand that, and release you from your services and hold nothing against you. How does that sound?" he asked, wishing to give him options and leave his doors open.
"If, of course you wish to remain in the service, then my door will be open to you upon arriving back in Welkin." he finished, his tone every bit as serious as before.
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Caden tentatively took the amber insect, and gingerly held it in his claws. He had to remember to NOT place his claws near his mouth tonight if he could help it. He wouldn't be eating this. Probably just chuck it down the nearest scupper when he got the chance.
He set the drawing down in between them, making sure it didn't drift off the platform and down into the barrels and ballast and... bilge water. He looked over at the ferret now, and considered this when he asked him. He was surprised Spender as asking him this, as if the ferret really cared about Caden's opinion.
"Well... Sender. You seem to be good at having fun. And coming up with games. I wish I had gotten to know that a bit sooner, because I just don't really..." he stopped there, figuring it best not to revisit that. "Anyways, you seem a lot happier and just... more self-assured than I am. Maybe not self-assured, but you just don't seem to let things bother you as much. I'm not very good at that myself. I grew up without a family for seven years. That's... almost half my life now. Half my life without parents. I just don't think I'm very good at things I try. I even wonder if I'll pass my exam and make Lieutenant when the time comes."
He sighed, and clasped his paws in between his legs, clamping his knees around them and squishing them tight. "I mean even Carrow seems closer to Selvis than he is to me. They're always together... every minute of the day it seems. Even tonight they arrived on the fighting top together. It's like they're brothers or something. I tried helping Carrow out like that, but I must've done something wrong. It's made me a bit jealous of Selvis, I have to admit. He already knows that though, so no use telling him." Caden added, just in case Spender wanted to go and blab that.
"I dunno. You might not be good at doing your job, but I'm sure you can get better at it. I could help you do that. And maybe... maybe you could show me how to not let things bother me as much. I guess I just feel like I constantly need to fit in... because so far I haven't really fit in well anywhere. I know Carrow and Selvis are my friends, but I just feel like I'm not doing enough, or that I'm doing something wrong. I don't know." he said, shaking his head. What he wouldn't give for his hammock right about now... and his paltry four hours of sleep tonight.
"So at least you seem happy all the time, or at least like you just enjoy life a bit more than I do. I'd say those are things you're good at. You got a cool brother, you have famous parents, and you know how to have fun. So yeah." he shifted his paws behind him, resting them as supports on the platform as he leaned back. "That's how I see it."
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Post by Carrow on Feb 28, 2011 17:29:57 GMT -5
Heart-rending. Oh, if Ladorak only knew just how heart-rending Selvis saw his situation as! Hopeless, too, though he didn't want to admit that to the ermine Captain - not least because he was worried about how he might react to his own admission. Thinking it was one thing but actually working up the courage to say it was something entirely different, and Selvis wasn't really feeling all that courageous at this point. He needed someone to be there for him, and was grateful for Ladorak's presence, perhaps more grateful than he could put into words. Talking with another creature about his predicament helped, and the fact that Ladorak was letting the longtail look into his gentle, reassuring green eyes whilst he spoke was aiding the Ferlusanian further.
He had to admit something to himself, however, and it was that Ladorak's help wasn't enough. He was doing his best, but right now, for Selvis, it wasn't enough. It just fell short. Even Carrow's efforts didn't quite suffice. These two creatures were the only ones who even came close to understanding the depths of despair he had sunk into as of late. but he needed some more paws to help hold him up. He hadn't told Caden yet, but he really wished the pine marten were here so he could tell him about his troubles. He needed all the help he could get, from all of his friends and acquaintances, all those who cared about him. They all needed to know so they could try to help him out of the black pit he had slid into, because now he depended on them all so utterly, so entirely that he found it truly difficult to put it into words. No one beast's assistance would be enough to rescue him - he felt as though he were too far gone for such a thing to happen.
He listened to the taller mustelid speak, taking everything in without saying a word in response. Oh, so he'd been learning about his ancestry, had he? That sounded very interesting indeed; something he himself had been thinking of delving into at a later stage in fact. The ermine soon finished speaking, and in the silence that followed, the sound of Selvis's brain in action as he digested the proposal might well have been slightly audible, as he was processing it at a lighting-fast pace. It really did sound attractive, but before he could voice his opinion on this, he had to reveal the root of his fear... the root of the depression that had claimed him since that night in Florence.
"You don't think it'll break in the foreseeable future, sir? Well, that's good to know. The one thing that's really frustrating and..." He sighed, before continuing. "...yes, upsetting me - quite a lot in point of fact even though I've been trying not to show it for the last while, is that, well, history has this nasty habit of repeating itself, so I've learned, and I'm really, genuinely worried that I could wake up some day and everything I thought was safe up to that point had been taken away from me. I'm terrified that things will change, and that I'll be left in a rather unfortunate situation... a dilemma that I can't seem to get out of my mind, something that's making me panic and making me lose sleep... something I could never remember doing before it took hold."
He cleared his throat again before continuing. "OK, so let's say war does indeed break out. I'd be left with two choices: continue to fight on the Welkin side and be branded a traitor, knowing that from then on, if ever I should set paw on home soil, I'll be strung up in a matter of days, or perhaps even worse..." He shuddered, having heard mention of the guillotine being used in Rosferia on numerous occasions. As far as he knew, that method of execution wasn't practiced at home, but he couldn't help but keep it in mind. "It'd be wonderful for me to stay with you and Caden in Welkin, of course, but... I'd never be able to see my family again, or even write to them. I'm sure they would still love me - I mean, they'd have better memory of the past difficulties between our two nations than I would, for obvious reasons, and they'd already given me their blessing long before I left - but even still, the thought of losing them like that worries me so much. For all intents and purposes they would be lost to me if I decided to stay on, and all I'd have left would be memories."
Tears started welling up in his eyes as he gave up trying to keep his earlier promise. Considering this so intensely was causing him pain, mental, emotional and (he could swear) physical too, and he could no longer keep his emotions in check. "If, however, I go with your suggestion, there is one major drawback to it that I'm not sure I'd be able to live with either. If I went home I'm not sure I'd ever hear from my friends again, and... oh, I don't even want to think of what that would do to me. Caden, Elliot and Carrow -- I love them with all my heart, and to leave them like that... I'm not sure I'd ever be able to get over it. The sights we'll have seen by then, if this ever happens, the lives we'll have lived... everything that I will, without a shadow of doubt, treasure... I won't be able to forget any of it... they'll always be there in my memory... but I don't want them to be just memories, Captain. I want to stay with them. They're the reason I even joined in the first place, to be quite honest, and they're what's keeping me going right now. So I couldn't do that to myself... I couldn't, just couldn't, do that to THEM..." He groaned softly before wiping a paw across his eyes. There was nothing he could do. He would lose creatures he cared about no matter what decision he made. No matter which path he took, there would be agonising emotional pain to come. He found himself in a cruel dilemma: damned if he did, and damned if he didn't.
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Carrow, at this point, was about a whisker away from becoming visibly unsettled. by Willard's conduct. The smile on his face didn't seem to fit at all. He had just been informed about the weasel's mother's death, and yet Willard was there, grinning away as if nothing had happened. He nodded silently when Willard offered his condolences in return, and his eyebrows rose in surprise when he heard about the fate of the weasel's father. Wow, he thought, that must be painful for him: the side that he's on was responsible for killing his own flesh and blood. He was about to say something, but then Willard's voice seemed to change.
He began to go off on a long, rambling compliment to the HMS Agamemnon, and the field mouse felt a shiver creep up his spine as he stood there and listened to the weasel speak. He realised that once again his offer of help had been swept under the metaphorical carpet. His whiskers drooped once more. He was disappointed. Disappointed and frustrated. He didn't know what to say to Willard now that he had gone off on one. He was concerned about him, sure, but the least weasel was coming on like he didn't even want his help, and this wasn't something the rodent felt he was able to deal with. He let his mind drift a little as Willard spoke, passively taking everything in even though he felt like he were somewhere else.
It's a ship, he thought despairingly, a bloody ship! I don't know if you've noticed, but no matter how much you think your precious vessel might listen to you, it can't talk back. 'She' can't offer advice. 'She' is not going to help you at all. 'She' is a construction, whilst I am standing here before you, well able to try and help you if you so wish. This is why I value friendships so much. I'd take somebeast like Caden, Elliot or Selvis over anything else, any day. They care about me, and I care about them rather a lot. But you... even though I care about you, don't want my help... Spender is more deserving of my assistance than you are. I won't abandon him if he ever needs me... you don't even seem to think you need HELP, full stop, when I can see clearly how close you are to going to pieces. It's not natural to keep your emotions buried like this. Trust me, I know. You need somebeast ELSE to talk to. I'm here, trying my best to be that very creature. You may not even realise it, but you've turned me away...
Then Willard whispered that he loved the ship, and Carrow lost his nerve. He'd had enough. If an onlooker with little knowledge of Willard had been regarding this situation, they would have seen a mouse desperate to assist what looked like an insane weasel. "I have to get going now Willard. I'm sorry, but I'm needed back up on the weather deck." He was speaking the absolute truth. He wanted to check in with Selvis, but he was indeed needed, though he didn't quite know it; the longtail was in dire straits, perilously close to losing it, and he needed more support. "If you ever need somebeast to speak to, my earlier offer still stands. Otherwise, I wish you the very best of luck in coming to terms with your setbacks." Carrow wouldn't ignore the Welkin weasel if he was ever approached by him, but Willard's behaviour was causing him internal irritation. None of it showed on the outside, however. He merely smiled, resisting a rather strong urge to pat the weasel on the shoulder, because he didn't seem like the kind who tolerated it and it showed, and tell him everything was going to be alright... because he knew in his heart that until the weasel faced up to his sadness and dealing with what had happened, things wouldn't be OK. He was clearly delusional, and Carrow didn't want to have that on his plate as well. There was no room for it - his friends came first, then Spender's worries did (despite everything he didn't want to give up on him and so put him before himself) and his own troubles occupied third place. "I'll see you around... and I'll be here if you need me." Without another word, he turned and started slowly heading back the way he had come. Disappointed. So much for trying to help him...
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Post by bookity101 on Mar 1, 2011 16:40:22 GMT -5
Elle looked to where Reisander was indicating, back pedaling to keep the little beasty from doing something he would, well she would, regret.
"Oh that, that's one of the good jacks. There is no need to attack him with that um..." She removed the spoon from his grasp and took his paw instead.
"Spies typically stick to the darkest part of the ships, which means below decks, around the cannons and such." Elle glanced around the hatchways, wondering what it would take to get the little beasty into his hammock... Before he attacked anyone with a kitchen implement...
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Post by spender on Mar 1, 2011 17:56:50 GMT -5
With effort, Willard pulled himself away from the bulkhead and followed after Carrow. He stopped at the bottom of the steps, arms stretched out to grasp the railing on either side, and looked up at the mouse's retreating back.
"Carrow! Wait!"
Willard's voice had changed drastically. The smooth tones of calmness had vanished like gravel into the crack of a volcano—a hungry, angry volcano that trembled in delight at the very thought of someday erupting. The weasel's eyes were no longer glazed, but held the same distance; only now they were piercing through, like stars in the midnight sky, alone, separated from the observer by thousands upon million of tortuously isolated light years.
"Does it get any easier?"
Reisender pouted. It was his spoon. How dare the beech marten take it from him! He plotted a way to get it back...
"Der spies are hidink?" he asked. He had a curious way of phrasing his questions—his voice, rather low for such a small creature, tended to rise an octave or two at the very last syllable, giving his rumbling male monotone an undignified squeak of intrigue. "In der hammock? UH-oh," he added.
A very familiar orange-furred mousemaid was rising out of the hatchway, followed by a very, very humoured ferret who was struggling not to laugh. Peskers glanced around and spotted them in good time, and directed Tally over.
"Found this little mouse thinking you were stuck in a cannon," Peskers said, bending down to Reisender's level. Reisender suddenly grinned. Peskers looked up at Elle, realising what she'd just done: given him a new idea.
"Oh, dear. Hey, Beechy—fancy helping us take this little booger back to his da on the lower gun deck?" She lowered her voice to a whisper. "Also, I think you might be interested t'hear something concerning 'our jacks'..."
Spender blinked.
"You got problems," he said, as if just realising it. "An' yer bein' a silly goof about it. Yer not doin' anythin' wrong, or else you'd get in trouble for it. An' of course you fit in—you're th'leader! Everyone looks up t'you. They're your gang. 's why 'm so scared of all of you. If you said, 'Go punch Spender', they'd do it. Th'way Elliot looks at you... how can y'feel y'don't belong?"
The ferret shook his head.
"Thing is... when you're stupid like me, 's easy t'have fun. I don' have t'worry about studyin' or tryin' t'remember hard stuff, 'cos I can't anyway. I always get in trouble when I play. I'll be chasin' chickens around an' someone'll come around an' tell me t'stop chasin' chickens, 's stupid, they say. Well, so'm I! I can't play smart games. So wot should I care if they don' think I should be chasin' chickens? Wot else is there for me t'do, y'know? I like stupid games. They're more fun, an' they're easy, an' sometimes I can win 'em. Not like chess, that's too hard. Chess is a game for smart beasts. I only learned how t'play it 'cos my sister can't play th'more fun games 'cos she's stuck inside an' she's too smart for blocks. 's why I kept askin' you, 'cos I know y'don't wanna play a stupid game like blocks, but maybe... maybe you'd wanna play a smart game with a stupid beast like me. But I guess y'don't like doin' that, either... 'm too borin' for you, I guess. So I dunno. If you wanna have fun, Caden, y'gotta stop bein' so bloody smart. Maybe that's your problem."
To emphasize his point, he playfully poked the marten in the forehead. Then he pointed at the candy.
"Y'gonna eat that? Gimme, 's my turn for a bit."
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Post by Ladorak on Mar 1, 2011 23:32:07 GMT -5
Ladorak's face fell as he listened to Selvis. "I know. I know young lad. Now come here. It's going to be alright. Everything will be OK." He moved closer to Selvis, wrapping his arms about the long tail, and giving him a reassuring squeeze and a pat on the back. "You're very strong for having made it this far, especially with what little options you have open to you, as you've made quite clear."
"Now listen to me youngster." the ermine said, releasing him. "You have a long life yet ahead of you. It's not going to be cut down by combat... and even if it is, it won't matter to you when you pass into the great beyond anyway. You have many natural years yet ahead of you, and what war has lasted forever? Why, the longest war on this continent was more than a century ago. They generally don't last ten years. Even if it say, lasts ten years, you'd only be what? 23 when it ended? Why that's plenty young to return to your folks and enjoy life with them, wouldn't you say?" the ermine asked in comforting tones.
"You wouldn't even be of 25 yet. I just don't think this war is going to last as long as that. It won't consume your life. It WILL be your life... but it shall not eat you. And that is of course provided Ferlusan breaks off and joins Rosferia, which I see as next to impossible at this stage. The worst I think that could happen is they would be knocked out of the war, and no longer be fighting. Calm your mind now... rest your fears. There's no point in getting so worked up over this just yet. You'll be fine... surrounded by your good friends to keep you company in the lonely hours as we ply the sea. And if you're lucky, in June, you'll be fighting in a battle I could only dream about taking part in, and still hope to someday." he reminded the long tail.
"You have many experiences yet ahead of you young Selvis. Never lose sight of that. I grew up without my parents, and never knew who they were for the longest time. Until I was in my early twenties. I know what it is like to feel alone, and lost on the tides. But I was finally removed from my situation, and for the better I might add." he stated, looking down at him from behind his spectacles. "I know you won't have to struggle like I did though. I basically had to survive on force of will alone... and even then I wasn't that good at it back then." he chuckled a little, shaking his head. Those were the dreadful days...
The bell was struck eight times behind them, signaling midnight, and the end of the First Watch. "Well then... that's my cue. Time to head to bed... and I suggest you do the same. See you for the tail end of the Morning Watch then. Oh and... before you go, are you feeling at least a little better?" he inquired, wanting to make sure the long tail was in improved spirits before the youth headed off to retrieve his hammock and sling it down below.
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The First Watch was ending, and the crew that was still awake was moving up to the hammock railings to retrieve their hammocks and bring them down below, whilst the Master and Arms and Corporals were rousing the sleeping crew to start the Middle Watch. Caden could hear the commotion above them, and stood up to stretch. "Wow... time flies." he muttered. "We'd best go and get our hammocks. I don't know about you Spender, but I'm exhausted. Oh uh... yeah sure. Here." he gave the lolly back to Spender, not intending to eat it anyway.
He mounted the stairs leading up to the orlop deck. They had a long climb ahead of them, but Caden picked up the pace, moving at a good rate so as to reach the weather deck in reasonable time. The sooner he got his hammock set up, the more time he would have to rest out of the four hours they got tonight.
"Hey, about what you said... I guess you're right. Maybe I am the leader. But I don't actively seek to be. The others just look up to me because I know how to survive and I stick up for my beliefs. I don't think you bore me either. I enjoyed our chess game. I just... I guess I had to grow up way too fast now that I think about it. I barely got to enjoy my kithood, because I was constantly in hiding and without any friends after mom died. My caretaker, she always said she had to keep me 'safe'. Well a lot of good it did... I had to learn how to take care of myself with nobody else to do it for me." he explained, climbing up to the bustling lower gun deck. The now woken crew were taking down their hammocks, rolling them up and heading topside.
He didn't even bother trying to pick his way through them, and instead stuck to the fore companionway, heading up those stairs to the upper gun deck. He was NOT going to become dumber for Spender's sake. He let out a laugh though all the same. "About me becoming well... not as smart. I can't do that Spender. I mean, I want to become a Captain someday, and make Ladorak proud, and to me, that's a goal I'd give my all for. But like I said, just because we have to work, that doesn't mean we still can't have fun. I ALWAYS try to enjoy my leisure time. I balance work and play, so that I don't get in trouble."
He was huffing now, taking the steps two at a time as he reached the upper gun deck, then rounded the stairs and started up to the weather deck, the evening light cascading down around him and greeting him as he moved out into the night air. His hammock was on the larboard side, near Spender's, and everyone else he knew real well, for that matter. The crew was charging up from down below, hammocks tucked under their arms, ready to deposit them, and some were in the process of taking the canvas cover off the rails, revealing the stowed hammocks in line, like silent sentinels waiting for their quarry.
Caden moved over, double checking the numbers in the darkness to make sure he had the right one. Yep, this was his. The albino slid it up and out of the railing, and grappled it with both paws. "So what do you say? I have to head down to the gun room now, and get some much needed rest. But do you want me to help you get better at this? I'm still willing to." as much as he wanted to say no.
Spender suggesting he be less smart probably annoyed him more than the ferret knew. As far as Caden was concerned, Spender was one rung above lost cause status. He should probably just avoid the ferret from here on out if he said no, but no need to let on to that just now. He was willing to give the furo the benefit of the doubt. Peskers and Elliot were close by, having been on the larboard side of the ship with Reisender beforepaw, Caden noted.
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Post by Carrow on Mar 2, 2011 8:39:53 GMT -5
Carrow hadn't been expecting much of any kind of response from Willard, as he'd seemed to be so entranced with the ship that he didn't really seem to care about anything - or anyone - else, but the mouse couldn't help but feel a slight amount of satisfaction when he heard Willard's voice coming to him from the bottom of the orlop deck stairs. There was something different in it at this point, though. For one thing (in fact this was the first thing that the field mouse noticed), the weasel had dropped his usual way of formally addressing a creature and seemed now to regard the rodent as a creature he was on first-name terms with. Before now it had always been 'Seajack Apodemus' this and 'Seajack Apodemus' that, but things had apparently changed.
The second thing that became clear to him was the extent of difference that was evident in Willard's voice at this stage. Gone was the air of blissful nonchalance that had seemed to envelop him earlier - Carrow was unsure whether that was a defence mechanism or something entirely different - and it had been replaced by the kind of thing Carrow had been hoping to see: Willard actually showing that he was vulnerable and for once not being ashamed to admit it. Carrow liked to see that, when others expressed their feelings instead of bottling them up. He'd only realised that kind of carry-on didn't really work a few years ago, but was now quite vehemently against it. Well, as vehemently as a mild-mannered mouse who was still pretty much frightened of his own shadow could be.
He turned around to face the weasel, and for some reason, the next sentence he heard made him sigh. It was a deep, exasperated sigh. He was exasperated now because Willard had just opened himself up for a response that the mouse didn't feel all that much like giving, even though he knew it was the truth, at least for himself. He had first paw experience of pondering that very same question. Night after night after harrowing night. He didn't shake his head as he knew this would crush the weasel's spirit; yet he didn't nod as this would no doubt fill the mustelid with false hope, and the mouse saw such an action to be like a blunt knife: completely without any point. He simply spoke, right from his heart, full of honesty and with as much clarity as he could muster. "Does it get easier? Well, I'm going to be honest and admit to you that the only reason I'm still here is because I've made some very, very good friends in the last year. Caden, Selvis and Elliot are what keep me going, and I mean that so completely I struggle to put it into words at times.
"You want to know if it gets any easier, Willard, but I can't say if it will for you. I hope it does, but then again I don't exactly know you too well, and can only speak from my own experiences. After my parents died, I wondered if things would ever get easier for me, but they didn't. They got worse and worse until I thought nothing else could possibly happen to bring me down. I was lost. Even with the support I had at home, I was still lost. Granted, there were plenty of other things in my life that had contributed to me feeling this way, but I felt lost all the same. Now, I feel better than I've been in a long while, and I have my friends to thank for that."
The rodent smiled a little as he quickly descended the steps, stopping just above Willard and looking at him with a kind expression on his face. "I don't know if there are other things making life difficult for you, but there's one thing I can say for sure: whether or not you survive in this life depends on what kind of creature you are. I've had to deal with plenty of things in my life, but the thing is that I've learned it's better to just keep going. Whatever my life is like, it's better than not being around. I have more things to live for now than I ever did. Other creatures, too. I'm looking at you now, and d'you know what I see?" He grinned, reaching out to pat the weasel on the shoulder. Bother him if he doesn't like it, I want to show him... no, make him understand that I care.
"I see a weasel who's better equipped to deal with what his life throws at him than I ever was. Something tells me you're a lot stronger than you might think. I reckon it'll get easier for you. Like I said, I can't say for sure, but one thing that will help is this: I can tell there's a lot of emotion within you right now whether you realise it or not. You should let it out somehow. It's helped me, it helped Caden, I think it even helped Selvis as well, even though it seems to me he'll need a little more assistance than that." As he spoke, the ship's bells tolled eight times. Carrow's shift was over and he could look forward to resting - hopefully. He was tired enough to rest, but his mind often had other ideas "Don't be ashamed to cry, either... sometimes it's the most natural thing any of us can do. I'm quite certain you'll be able to manage this." He smiled again. "Now, I need to retrieve my hammock and get down to the lower gun deck for some shuteye. Whether I'll sleep or not is an entirely different matter, but I'll see you again sometime. Best of luck, and take care of yourself... Seajack Waters," he quipped, winking at the weasel before turning and heading back up the orlop deck stairs.
His hammock was stowed on the weather deck, so the rodent headed for it, hoping he had helped Willard in any way, shape or form. He reckoned Selvis hadn't gone too far. The mustelid had seemed rather pensive after all. He hoped he'd be able to see him again before they all turned in for the night. His package was still unopened. Time had flown, and if he opened Archie's letter whilst in his hammock, he KNEW he wouldn't sleep. That could wait until the first available opportunity in the morning, and that was good enough for him.
--
Selvis almost burst into tears when Ladorak wrapped his arms around him and gave him a hug. He rested his head against the ermine's chest for a moment. Now his own bottom lip was quivering and he had to fight hard not to start crying even as Ladorak reassured him. 'Everything will be OK?' It didn't seem like that to him, but there was something in the taller mustelid's voice that calmed his nerves and comforted him - and at this stage, the longtail needed all the comfort he could get. Despite all this he remained perilously close to a breakdown of some sort. The squeeze and the pat on the back also helped him, however.
He was starting to realise that Ladorak really knew how to calm a creature down. His techniques were definitely working on the weasel. He did indeed listen as the ermine spoke, and something about his words struck a chord with Selvis. Even though he was unsure he'd be able to read the letter without crying, he saw that he was powerless to change anything. No matter what happened he would lose something, and there was nothing he could do - but there was also nothing he needed to do, other than let things take whatever course they did.
He waited until the ermine had finished speaking. His voice had remained soft and gentle throughout. It was very easy to pay attention to, and despite the fact that he had been hanging on Ladorak's every word, it had had an almost hypnotic effect on the longtail who suddenly realised that he was one very tired mustelid indeed. He'd been in agony for the last couple of hours and felt completely worn out. He yawned softly, covering his mouth with a paw and blinking sleepily. "Ten years, sir? I can't quite wrap my tail around that one. I can't even see past the next ten weeks, never mind ten years. If I'm honest it feels like a lifetime, even though I know it won't be... at least if I'm lucky. I don't want to think of that far ahead... at least not anymore. I did when I was younger and sometimes I was scared I wasn't making the most of the present. Ten years... you're sure?"
Selvis shrugged his shoulders in a tired manner. "Oh well. We'll just have to see how things go." Unable to stop himself, the longtail yawned again. Now he thought about it he could scarcely remember ever being this tired. "You suggest I retire for the night, sir? Well, that's a good suggestion! I'm rather weary now, I have to admit... though whether I'll sleep is another matter." He chuckled, despite the gravity of the situation. "Maybe I need to get Carrow to teach me some of those self-hypnosis techniques he knows! I haven't spent a sleepless night in the longest time, but well, I have my doubts about tonight..."
Selvis sighed now, but it was a sigh of gratitude more than anything else. "Thank you, Captain Fugate, sir. I'll be honest and say that at least now I don't feel as sad as I did earlier on. I really appreciate your help. Maybe things will look better in the morning... then again maybe they won't. I'm not sure. I've really been hit hard by all this, sir, I have to admit, and it'll take me a little while yet to come out of it..." Once again the weasel looked at the letter in his paw and frowned slightly despite himself. "Truth be told I'm not really sure of many things anymore... but I know what you told me is right: my friends will help me through this. I'm glad we talked, sir. I'll see you tomorrow after we've had breakfast. Until then." He saluted, smiling slightly at Ladorak, in spite of the turmoil he was going through, before turning and padding gently over to the area where the hammocks were stowed. He saw Caden and Spender approaching and followed them over to the larboard side hammocks. He was soon by Caden's side, and his smile had widened. His eyes were just a tad red-rimmed from tears, but the last thing he would ever care about was whether anybeast, never mind a good friend of his, could see he'd been crying. "Hello Caden, hello Spender," he said gently. "It's been quite a night, hasn't it?" He sniffled a little. It had been for him, anyhow. "I'm exhausted."
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Post by bookity101 on Mar 2, 2011 22:45:49 GMT -5
Elle couldn't help but smile in relief now that she found somebeast who would be able to tell her where to put this hyper active kit for the night.
"Yes, yes I think that this fellow might be ready to check down stairs for any suspicious activity." She rolled her eyes at Peskers, as she too realized the ideas that were now swimming around in the devious little beasties mind now.
"I don't think that you will fit in the cannons Reisander. You are much larger than a cannonball..." She tucked the spoon back into his pocket before she pawed him off to Tally. "And let's avoid stabbing anybeast to death with kitchen implements, alright?"
Elle looked at Peskers, intrigued by what she said.
"What are-" She lowered her voice and glanced around to make sure that no beast was in ear shot, and Tally wouldn't understand what they meant, plus she was a bit tied up with the little kit.
"Our jacks up to anyway?"
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Post by spender on Mar 3, 2011 4:22:08 GMT -5
Something was bugging Spender, and it wasn't the lolly he now had stuck in his teeth (he didn't like fondling the stick too much, and licked it occasionally as it poked out the side of his mouth.) He'd thought he'd misheard earlier, and so had ignored it, but...
Famous? Whatever were his parents famous for? Owning a smelly little inn? Letting him scare the neighbour's livestock? Was that in the news?
He meant to ask, but Caden was too quick up the stairs. Spender followed.
"But do you want me to help you get better at this? I'm still willing to."
The ferret rubbed the back of his neck.
"Ummm... okay." He seemed as surprised by this answer as Caden was. "I guess... if 'm alive t'morrow." He gave a nervous grin. Suddenly, all the memories of what the morning had in store for him came back.
Spender let himself get lost in the activity, in an effort to forget again. He located his hammock—he couldn't give the number off the top of his head, but he knew it well enough by sight now—and tugged it out. He was in a cheerful mood now, and decided to do his best to show off. He planted his footpaws on the side of the rail and when his hammock popped free, he rolled over backwards, striking the back of his head against the deck.
"'m okay," he said immediately, "hur, hur, oww... 'm okay."
He stood up and, after making sure he hadn't tore himself open again, looked down, lifting his leg up to look at the bottom of his footpaw. Somehow in that show, his lolly had popped out of his mouth and was now stuck on in his fur.
"Oops."
He looked around, grinning like an idiot to see if anyone had chuckled. C'mon, Caden... Selvis...
"Our jacks," Peskers whispered back, "seem to, maybe, be getting along for once. I think this is it, Elliot." She stressed the end, in case someone had good enough hearing. "We've all tried, but I think this time, maybe Spender will actually be ready for it. Will you help us? Keep Caden's spirits up if something goes awry?"
By now, everyone was coming up and crowding the deck. Even Reisender's father made a disgruntled appearance, grunted a light scolding at Tally, and hauled his brat off back down to resume his sleep. Tally bowed her head, though made no other outward appearance that she was upset with herself for failing to get Reisender in bed at the appointed time. Peskers watched as the mousemaid worked her way over to the Captain's cabin, where Molly was waiting in the doorway to accept her. The stoat jill drew the little mouse up into her arms, nuzzled her neck, and whisked her away back inside.
"Aww, cute," Peskers said. "C'mon, we'll talk more during set-up. Let's go get our hammocks out." She gestured at the railing, where the other mustelids had gathered, and added a confused "What in..."
The ferret jill could only stare blankly as Spender took what seemed to be a planned tumble. For what purpose, she could only guess at.
"Jacks," she sighed under her breath.
Willard soaked up the advice quietly. His resolve strengthened the more Carrow went on, until at last he was smiling again. This was an altogether different kind than the ones that had graced his muzzle previously. It was a shy thing, worried and unstable, but ultimately proud of what it was.
He would survive. He would not be lost. Not so long as he had the Ags—and her crew.
He was unable to reply to Carrow in any way before the mouse was off again, but after a moment or two, Willard found himself chasing after. He caught up with Carrow on the weather deck, and followed the mouse to his hammock, where he reached in and grasped it before Carrow could.
"I'm taking next watch as well," he explained, "so I don't need my hammock. Please—let me help you set up yours?"
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Post by Ladorak on Mar 3, 2011 12:17:28 GMT -5
Make sure that you do take stock in those things, young one
Ladorak watched the departing long tailed weasel with some concern, but said nothing more on it, as it was time for rest. If he could find rest of course. On some nights, the ermine would pace the quarterdeck tirelessly, or simply spend an hour or two gazing up at the stars and moon as they slid by thanks to the gliding of his vessel over the seas. And some nights, like tonight, he would watch the dark ocean slip by underneath the stern of his vessel from the comfort of his balcony.
Turning, he began heading aft, dodging crew members who belatedly saluted, at least one or two of them dropping their hammocks accidentally when when they did so. Ladorak smiled at them, saluted back, and in some instances even helped them retrieve their belongings which had tumbled about. He wondered if Molly was still awake. She sometimes stayed up waiting for him when she knew he was on watch.
The Marines outside his cabin came to attention, and saluted as he moved past. The ermine gave them a nod, and proceeded past the Master's cabin on his right, and his Clerk's cabin on his left. Both would be asleep, of that he was sure. He circled around the mizzenmast, and entered into his dining room. It was dark, and he was sure Molly was probably to his left, in his sleeping quarters. The dark shapes of his dining table and their chairs littered his vision, but he could see little beyond them.
He padded over to the door, and knocked lightly upon it. "Molls? I'm going to be outside on the balcony for a few minutes. I'll be in soon." he called softly to within. Turning to his right, he opened the door into his day cabin, a spacious and wide office that contained his desk, his furniture, and everything else he had brought aboard. Swords hung on the walls, as did paintings, and a red carpet adorned the floor.
He kicked his boots off, letting them fall aside, and padded in his now naked footpaws over to the stern windows, the ones that swept out on either side of him and gave him a tremendous view out the back of the ship. He turned the handle on one that doubled as a door, and opened it to be met by the cold outside air.
Ladorak Fugate strode out onto his balcony, placing his paws on the railing, claws resting easily as he did so. Looking out, the ermine gazed contemplatively out to sea. The rocking of the ship was nice, and would probably induce him to crawl into his golden hanging cot in a few minutes or so, sleeping peacefully next to his fiancee... if she was alseep of course.
He stood there, silent, mute, and watched the moon reflect its beams off the water's surface.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Caden greeted Selvis as he hefted his hammock, and gave the weasel a nod. "Yes Selvis... a bit slow on my end... but..." it didn't take a genius to see that Selvis had been crying. Caden knew that look, and recognized the red that indciated the weasel's eyes were bloodshot and bleary.
He was about to say something when Spender threw himself backward off the hammock rails, having been stupid enough to try standing on them to wedge his hammock out in the first place. He smacked the deck with a thud, and Caden winced. It was a good five foot fall after all, and doing it backward...
"Spender! Are you..." but the albino trailed off as Spender answered in the affirmative that he was in fact OK. Caden sighed, realizing Spender had probably done that on purpose. It was more a sigh of relief though, at the fact that the ferret hadn't seriously injured himself, or so it seemed.
The albino marten could see the lolly sticking out of Spender's fur, and he immediately recognized this as Spender's call for attention, but instead of turning away with disgust, the marten instead began to smile, and then laugh a little. It wasn't forced, but it wasn't of course a full blown guffaw.
"Heheheh... hahah. Here mate... let me help you up." he reached his paw down, grasped Spender's own, and pulled him back to standing. "Silly ferret you are." he informed him, smiling widely. "Go and get some sleep... oh and... maybe talk to Captain Fugate tomorrow about me helping you, OK?" he clapped the ferret on the back, and looked to Selvis.
"Hey Selvis, I'm gonna go and sling my hammock and get set up, but I'll come back out to the gun deck to see you to bed, if you want. Can wish each other good night or something." he suggested, and gave the long tail a nod.
Taking his hammock in his arms, the albino started heading for the companionway. Time to get setup and ready for sleep! At long last! He made his way down the stairs, ducking his head as he proceeded first onto the upper gun deck, and then down into the lower gun deck. Instead of moving forward, like the rest of the crew would be, Caden headed aft, towards the gun room.
The albino nodded at the Marine sentries, and they barely acknowledged him as he moved through the doorway cut into the canvas bulkhead. Either side of him were cabins for the Marine Lieutenants, as well as the Gunner, being the first room on the right. He moved past the line of closed doorways, all the way aft towards the great tiller, which swung a little from side to side as the Quartermasters up above corrected the ship's course.
Seeing Ocean setting his hammock up, Caden decided to hang his next to the ermine's. "Good evening Ocean."
"Evening Caden." Ocean responded, pushing his paws down into the mattress to soften it up a little and get the stiffness out. Caden started undoing the ropes that tied his hammock up into the sausage shaped bundle it was. Unrolling it on the deck, the hammock revealed the mattress, pillow and blankets within. Taking the ropes on either end, Caden attached the metal loops into the hooks that stuck out of the ceiling. Behind him, he could hear Ocean climbing up and flopping down into his hammock, which swung a bit with his weight.
Caden tested it to make sure it was secure, and nodded in satisfaction when it was. He looked over at Ocean's now prone form, surrounded and wrapped up like he was as the hammock curled around either side of him to prevent him from falling out. Like a larva in a cocoon, the marten thought.
Caden smiled, and moved back down the length of the gun room, heading towards the bulkhead and passing back through the doorway out into the once again crowded lower gun deck. He was standing to the side of the mizzenmast, and his pink eyes squinted and looked around him at all the beasts slinging their hammocks about him. Now... where did Selvis typically hang his again? He was pretty sure the long tail would be looking for him anyways, so it would probably be only a matter of seconds before they located each other.
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Post by Carrow on Mar 4, 2011 13:37:06 GMT -5
Selvis groaned (albeit only slightly) when he saw Spender throw himself off the hammock rails. The ferret was now apparently trying to draw attention to himself by performing stupid stunts like that. He also didn't like the fact that it was a five foot fall. There was a lot of room in such a trick for a creature to injure himself, and the longtail wouldn't have been all that surprised if Spender had actually ended up doing so to some extent. His contact with the deck was accompanioned by a rather heavy thudding sound, and for a moment the mustelid's eyes widened in concern. Before he could say anything, Spender was up on his paws again, saying that he was alright. It was just as well, as he would have found little sympathy forthcoming from the weasel due to the fact he had decided to risk injury just for a laugh.
Selvis didn't really see anything funny about courting injury like that, but the look on Spender's face convinced him it was better to put on at least a smile. So he did. He smiled a little at the ferret, and as he did so he realised that Spender didn't care at all about what had just happened. This nonchalant attitude was slightly amusing, and so the smile that ended up on his face (a good bit wider than the one he had feigned) was in fact genuine. "You'd want to watch yourself with stunts like that," he warned him cheerfully. "It might make for good comedy but I wouldn't go doing that too often if'n I were you!" Silly ferret indeed, he thought. Caden's right.
He nodded as the albino marten put his proposal to him, still smiling, though this time he had much better reason to do so. "I'd rather like that. Thanks for offering, Caden. I could really use something like that about now, I have to admit. It's been... er, a turbulent night, shall we say," he said softly, trailing off a moment before perking up again. "So I'll see you in a few moments, matey." He watched the marten leave, then took up his hammock. The action took a little more effort than usual, and this surprised the weasel. Even at this hour of the night he'd never been this tired. His recent turmoil had done a number on him, and he could no longer hide it... not that he wanted to though. It was better that his friends knew, instead of him keeping everything inside.
He followed Caden down the two flights of stairs that led to the lower gun deck, unaware that Carrow was nearby. He'd be able to catch up with the rodent a little later on, he knew, as the first thing he had thought of when choosing a place to sling his hammock was whether he'd be able to get close to one of his friends, and since Caden's elevated status meant he got to sleep in the gun room, he'd made sure to keep close to Carrow, and he knew that Elle was nearby as well. The hammock number he'd been pawed was 149, three over from her.
He was on the lower gun deck in a matter of moments, and headed for the stairs, near the galley, so he could finally put his hammock up and take some weight off his paws. The ropes were undone in a flash (he had always been good with such things) and the bundle was soon unrolled, revealing its contents. The weasel was still stronger than most despite even his recent flagging energy levels (not to mention spirit), and it didn't take him long to get everything set up. Testing the hammock to make sure he had done a satisfactory job, he smiled. He had indeed.
He began casting about for someplace he could perhaps meet Caden near. He knew that the marten would be somewhere towards the rear of the ship, so he began making his way back there, deciding to head for the gun room. With his paws once again free, the weasel let them drop to his sides and let them gently swing as he walked. They ached a little for some reason. The mustelid hadn't been doing any work that had been all that straining, but he'd just come through a particularly draining few hours, and now it seemed every part of him was tired. His strides were as purposeful as possible, however, and as soon as he began bearing down on the gun room, he spotted Caden near the mizzenmast. Quickening his pace to a slight jog (it was about as much as he could manage by this point), he was soon by the marten's side. "Hello again," he said gently. "Would I be correct in assuming you're all set?"
--
Carrow had been continuing on his way, back up to the weather deck, suddenly feeling a good deal better about Willard's reaction to his terrible situation. He'd glimpsed another smile on the least weasel's features before he had turned and taken the rest of the orlop deck stairs. The field mouse couldn't have been certain - he was admittedly very unsure about Willard's current mental condition - but he liked to think it was because the mustelid had seen the rodent's advice as helpful. He always tried to lend a paw whenever possible, and when he could see that his assistance was appreciated, he was given a lift too.
The four hours spent on watch had taken their toll on the mouse (who was more prone to tiredness than any of his companions due to the insomnia he suffered from). He'd had to put up with more sleepless nights as of late, and appeared to be dead on his paws. Everything about the way he carried himself suggested he was absolutely dying for rest, and his pace had slowed considerably by the time he arrived on the weather deck. He padded tiredly over to where the hammocks were stowed. He was becoming overwhelmed by exhaustion. It was never what he did that made him tired, it was how he slept at night, and since he'd never gotten a full night's rest (even when there had been eight hours available to him) it was at times like this that weariness descended upon him fully.
He'd been dimly aware of the presence of another creature behind him, but hadn't made the effort to turn around and see whom it was. Get to the hammock... meet your friends if they're still there... get down below and then try to sleep... This was almost all he could think about at this stage. He'd slid into a kind of drowsy, half-conscious state, and emitted a squeak of surprise when he saw Willard in front of him by a whisker all of a sudden.
The weasel's presence brought him back to himself a little, and he was a little disappointed to find that Selvis and Caden were nowhere to be found. The rodent put this down to his slow pace. He slept rather near the longtail anyhow, so wasn't worried about not seeing him again tonight, but he wanted to touch base with Caden too if he could help it at all - for as long as both of them were able to stay awake. He was quite certain his marten companion was worn out as well.
Willard had placed a paw on the mouse's hammock, and what he was offering to do gradually became clear to the mouse, and his tail rose in appreciation of the weasel's offer. "You want to help me, Willard?" He smiled, whiskers twitching in contentment. "That's very kind of you. Sure, you can help! I could use an extra pair of paws, admittedly. I've, er, never been all that good at pawdling this, sorry." Along with plenty of other things...
He put both paws beneath the sausage-shaped bundle that was his unrolled hammock and lifted it a little. "Could you help me hefting this, please? That's probably the most difficult part of it for me... well, usually, anyway. I'm not good with stairs even under normal circumstances, and with a weight like this in my paws it's even more difficult." He sighed a little. "Balance issues, y'see. If I should fall one of these days I won't be particularly surprised." The rodent let out a rueful chuckle. "Once I get down below it shouldn't be too hard to get set up, certaintly not between the two of us. We can work together on this." Carrow was exhausted and not really looking forward to an argument, so specifically requesting that the two of them help each other out was more for his own sake. He didn't want to have to put up with a bossy, officious Willard this time of the night. "So... on three?," he asked hopefully.
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